Dad's Diary - Summer Edition: Cuddle Bug
Summer Edition: Cuddle Bug
I’m going stir crazy.
I’ve scoured Aiden’s blog, hoping he would post something... anything. But it’s been silent. No posts… no emails… no calls… no messages…
The first few days I checked my phone every few minutes, just hoping I would see a something pop up...
And then the next few days I started checking every few hours...
And then once a day...
Now I barely look.
Ryan seems to be handling everything ok, but he’s been really clingy. He’s even sleeping in my room every night. I mean, I sympathize with the kid, but he’s barely giving me any privacy.
What I’m saying is... I haven’t jacked off in a week and I’m about to fucking lose it.
I started to give it a go while I was showering a few days ago... but he came in saying he had to pee. Just flopped out his dick and started pissing without even asking. And I mean... I know I’ve mentioned it, but Ryan’s dick is so big it almost embarrasses me, ya’ know? Like, I see it... it stuns me... and I blush. Like wtf.
Some guys just dominate the room sheerly with the size of their cock and Ryan is definitely one of those guys.
So, then... last night I left him alone downstairs while he finished his movie and tried to sneak under the covers for a bit. I mean... just a bit. I’m really fucking efficient... I can bust a nut in under two minutes if I need to, right?
But I get my pj’s down to me knees and start quickly getting to it... and the door just flies open and in walks Ryan, “You missed it, Mr. Sanders! They just blew up one of the cars and it was epic!”
And, of course, my face was burning as I latched onto the covers for dear life and nodded.
“You have to see it, I’ll rewind it!”
I mean... he was so excited, ya’ know? And it’s not like he has anyone around to talk to right now, besides me... so I just nodded and said, “I was about to lay down, but I’ll meet you down there in a minute.”
And by the time he left I was limp as a noodle and my teeth were grinding together. Kid has the worst timing.
I’ve even started having fever dreams. People touching me... brushing against me... but each time I get close to feeling good... the dream changes or I wake up.
And it doesn’t help that every morning I wake up to Ryan wrapped around me like I’m nothing more than a cuddle bug. I’m serious... that boy treats me like I’m just his personal, little spoon. A pillow between his legs.
Yesterday, I woke up and his dick was literally bulging between my ass cheeks, and his arm was clamped around my stomach, pinning me in place. I mean, thank God I’ve made a pajama rule since we’re both sleeping in the same bed.
But still… I couldn’t move. I could barely breathe...
I finally started saying “Ryan... Ryan... wake up, bud” only to have him yawn... casually move his arm, which consequently meant his hand suddenly pressed against my morning wood... and then grind hard into my ass. And I mean... really hard.
And I’ve never felt that, ya’ know? Pressure there, I mean. I didn’t realize that it felt like... fuzzy... kind of tingly and good, right? So, my dick naturally throbs as I’m lying there mortified... and so horny that I’m already on the verge of popping…
And Ryan finally rolls off of me... but I swear I heard him chuckle.
And for a minute I kinda’ got mad... ‘cause it felt like he was purposely fucking with me or something... until I realized he fell right back to sleep. I don’t think he even realized what he was doing.
The fact that I nearly nutted in his hand has me rattled. I’ve gotta get some ‘me’ time soon or I’m just gonna start busting in my pants.
But yeah. That’s about it. Happy 4th, I guess.
Originally I was going to take Aiden to the lake… they do a huge fireworks show every year… but I guess it’ll just be me and Ryan. Gosh, I sound like such an ass. I’m trying not to make Ryan feel like he’s… ya’ know… inferior and unwanted. It’s not that at all. I really love the kid. I’ll do anything for him.
But I miss Aiden so much. I feel broken. Just kind of numb to everything.
Which is why I haven’t been as good about writing things down lately. I guess, between missing Aiden and trying to handle Ryan and the divorce... I’m just kinda’...
Spent.
It’ll get better though.
It has to.
Right?
Previous Day:
The entry was very nice. We all know Dad cares about Aiden but Ryan is either playing him(which I doubt) or is missing Aiden and this is his way of releasing his concerns for him. It will be interesting to see if Dad gives in Ryan's subconscious attempts or if Dad takes charge. Either way, I see a charged time coming between them and a clue that Ryan mentions casually that leads them both to Aiden. Can't wait. Keep up the great prose, Jaxen.
Thx for the surprise edition.